“I Love the Peace at Hafiz’s Tomb in Shiraz,” says Spouse of Malaysian Ambassador to Iran.

 “I Love the Peace at Hafiz’s Tomb in Shiraz,” says Spouse of Malaysian Ambassador to Iran.

Dr. Sapardi is an international law Ph.D. holder from University of Newcastle, UK and is a known professor in her field in Malaysia who, between 2005 and 2007, was the Dean of the Law Faculty of MARA University of Technology. In the early 80s, she first met her husband on a flight and ever since, she has remained his best, most loyal companion. After her husband was sent as Malaysia’s Ambassador to Iran, she found life in Iran enjoyable enough to remember the country’s four seasons and magnificent nature, esp. colorful flowers and fragrant roses in the gardens. She also found peace in Shiraz at Hafiz’s Tomb which was something to remember.

AVA Diplomatic’s Exclusive Interview with

Dr. Musrifah Sapardi Rustam, Spouse of Malaysian Ambassador to Iran

Interview by Mohammadreza Nazari 

Where were you born? What were your father and mother? How many siblings do you have?

I was born in the State of Johore, which is the southern part of Malaysia. My late father was Haji Sapardi bin Haji Anuar. He was an Imam of our small mosque in Happy Village, in my hometown. My mother, Hajjah Rahmah binti Hj Rikin is an octogenarian and a homemaker. I have three brothers and three sisters, and I am the youngest.

What are your hometown’s most important handicrafts?

My hometown in Johor is known for its pottery especially from the Air Hitam district. We also produced rattan baskets and woven products in order to preserve our traditions and our multi-ethnic cultures. In fact, when I was young, my mother who is a homemaker used to make handicrafts such as tikar (mats) and tudung saji (food cover) which were weaved out of mengkuang (screw pine) leaves.

Where did you study before going to college?

I went to the English School Kulai 1 (ESK 1) for my primary education and later continued my high school studies from Form One to Upper Six at Sultan Ibrahim Girls School in Johor Bahru.

What did you study at the Universities? Tell us about your thesis title. And why did you specialize in International Law?

After my Higher School Certificate (equivalent to A Level), I received a government scholarship and studied law. I obtained my LL.B (Hons) degree from Universiti Teknologi MARA (UiTM) in Malaysia. I continued my postgraduate studies in England under the Young Lecturer Scheme Program and obtained my LL.M in International Law from University of Hull. Coming home from England, I joined the Faculty of Law at UiTM as a law lecturer before pursuing my doctorate degree and finally obtained a PhD in International Law from University of Newcastle upon Tyne, UK. My specialization was on Law of the Sea and the title of my thesis was “A Legal Analysis of the Malaysian Laws Governing Navigational Safety and Marine Pollution from Vessels relating to the Straits of Malacca”. I choose International Law based on the importance of the issues of globalization and the world is interconnected as well as it allows students to develop understandings into the global legal system and its influence on both national and international principles. I also did my sabbatical on International Straits and Maritime conflicts for a year at Lauterpacht Centre for International Law, University of Cambridge in 2008.

You also assisted in preparing the draft of the Amendment of Universiti Teknologi MARA Act?

In the beginning of my career at the Law School, besides teaching law to the students, I was the LL.B Course Tutor. I was later appointed as the Dean of the Law School at UiTM from 2005 to 2007. However, I had to relinquish the post to my successor because I wanted to be a trailing spouse and followed my husband who was posted as Deputy High Commissioner in London (2007-2011) and later as an Ambassador to the Sultanate of Oman (2011-2014).

Nevertheless, before following my husband to Tehran; I was the Deputy Legal Advisor of the University from 2015 to 2017. It was during this time that I was made as part of the Malaysian team under the Ministry of Higher Education and the Attorney General Chambers to assist in drafting the Amendments of the Universiti Teknologi MARA Act (Act 173). And, I was tasked to look into the provisions of the law and based on the current development of higher education in Malaysia, to update them or parts of them where necessary.

Where does the major of International Law at the Malaysian Universities stand in international competition?

The knowledge of International Law is pertinent to all aspiring lawyers. As such it is a compulsory subject to be taken by all law students in the Malaysian Universities. The Malaysian public universities also have taken parts in many international debates and moots competitions in the area of international law and in most cases the students excel and had shown their capabilities to compete against prestigious foreign universities in the world. For example, our law students have taken part and won the Best Mooter in the Phillip C. Jessup International Law Moot Court Competition in Washington D.C, which is the oldest and largest international moot competition in the world, attracting participants from almost 700 law schools in more than 100 countries.

When and where did you meet HE Mr Ambassador for the first time?

I met my husband on my way to England in early 1980s. Perhaps unfortunately or fortunately it was destined. We had the same ticket seat number on that ‘fateful night’ and neither of us wanted to relinquish or surrender that particular seat! Eventually, the stewardess then made us sat next to each other for the whole 16 hours flight bound for Heathrow. Today, he always says to his family, “one lawyer in the house is enough”. LOL.

Please share with us about the Malaysian culture and the wedding traditions in Malaysia.

Malaysia has a population of approximately 28 million people. It comprises of multi-ethnic groups namely – the Malays, Chinese, Indians, Kadazan, Dayak, Murut and other indigenous tribes that in turn contribute to the multi-cultural and multi-lingual society in the country. With regard to wedding traditions in Malaysia, as mentioned above the different ethnicities that currently predominant and exist in Malaysia offers the unique and distinctive cultural identities, with some cross over. I am from the Malay race. The Malay wedding ceremony for example, was derived and beautifully shaped from the diverse cultural traditions i.e. the combinations from the Indigenous, Hindus and Islamic. Basically, it has three stages, namely Stage I, Stage II and Stage III:

  • The first stage precedes the actual wedding ceremony which comprises of the following activities:
  • Merisik (Investigation by the Bridegroom Family)
  • Meminang (Proposing for the bride’s hand and the engagement)
  • Hantaran (Sending of gifts by both sides)
  • The second stage consists of the actual marriage ceremony, namely:
  • Malam Berinai (For the Bride – The Henna Night)
  • Akad Nikah (Solemnisation of the Couple and Mahar to the Bride)
  • The third stage consists of the wedding ceremony or reception after solemnization which includes:
  • Berarak (Arrival of the Bridegroom in procession)
  • Bersanding (The Groom joins and sits next to the Bride on the decorated dias)
  • Sambut Menantu (Welcoming the Groom to the Bride’s Family)
  • Bertandang (Welcoming the Bride to the Groom’s Family)

Does the bride take home appliances to her husband’s house?

I was made to understand that in the Iranian culture that it is common or a norm when a couple wants to get married, the suitor or potential bridegroom’s family is expected to provide the potential bride with an accommodation (house or matrimonial home) and to pay for the wedding reception; and in return the bride’s family is to prepare the basic appliances to be brought along with her to the matrimonial home such as marital bed and beddings, wardrobes, a set of television, refrigerator, sofa set, and etc.

Similarly, as part of the Malay wedding tradition, it is also expected that the suitor or potential bridegroom to provide ‘a roof’ or accommodation to his potential wife. If he is financially sound, during the Hantaran Ceremony (sending of gifts to the bride), among the gifts will include ‘duit hantaran’ i.e. dowry or a sum of money ranging from RM1000 to RM30000 to the bride’s family. With this sum of money as part of the gifts, the bride’s parents usually bought a complete set of marital bed with its wardrobes for the bride as gifts. And, once the solemnization and wedding ceremony at the bride’s family is over, the newly wed wife will take along with her the said complete set of marital bed to her new matrimonial home which was prepared by her husband.

What rituals or ceremonies are there when a child is born?

I am of the view; all parents believe that babies are blessings from The Al Mighty. And, they especially the grandparents always look forward to welcome and celebrate the little bundles of joy! In Malaysia, with reference to the Malay culture when a baby is born, first and foremost, if the baby is a boy then his father, grandfather or an elderly man would cite azan to the baby’s ears. If the baby is a girl, then iqamah would be recited to her ears. The purpose is non-other than that the new born children should hear the zikir of Allah upon their arrival to this world and to protect them from the evils. This is followed by tahneek of the newly born, namely rubbing a softened date upon the child’s palate or to putting into the child’s mouth some kind of sweets, in particular bits of kurma (dates) or sugar. This practice is done to provide the child with sugar which could pass into his / her system quickly and to protect him from deficiency.

After that there will be many ceremonies to commemorate the joy of welcoming the newly born babies. Among others:

  • Akikah (Animal Sacrifice) – This event is usually done on a week after the baby is born. The purpose is to announce the arrival of a new family and to include the poor people or orphans in the celebration by offering them food. The newly born parents may choose which types animals to be sacrificed ranging from camels, cows or sheep / goats.
  • Cukur Jambul (Hair Shaving) – It is a norm to invite close family members and friends to attend this joyous celebration where reciting Quran is usually done to bless the new child, followed by a marhaban or singing praises and good tidings to wish the baby well. The baby is then carried by his father or mother to the elders surrounding the child who will snip off a lock of hair, which is then placed into a bowl of water or a young coconut.
  • Naik Buai (Cradle-Rocking) – This event is usually held after the hair saving ceremony where the newly born baby will be placed inside a cradle where the guests could easily take a peek to see the baby and place some gifts to him or her, most commonly in cash or gold.
  • Bersunat (Circumcision) – Before reaching puberty, the Malay Muslim boys will have to undergo bersunat or circumcision. It is an act of removal the foreskin of the male genitals for hygiene purposes. As far as females are concerned, some Malay families send their baby girls for circumcision but it is not a compulsory deed.

Given the development trends in Malaysia, how have they affected the people’s social life?

The above traditions about celebrating ceremonies of newly born children are still and widely in practice among the Malay communities in Malaysia. Newly born is indeed a bundle of joy and, to many of us, it one of the most exciting universal human experiences. For most people, it is a time for celebration and accounts for a happy and joyous social life where the parents, families and communities come together to honour and welcome the new addition. For the babies and their parents, the ceremonies serve as important anchor to their history. The celebrations also function as an in road for families to solidify their connection to the community, culture and heritage.

We know that Malaysia is a culturally diverse nation. You have national costumes and different types of attires for both males and females. Do you have any plan to hold an exhibition on Malaysian women attires in Iran?

Indeed, Malaysia which comprises of 14 States in both the Malay Peninsula and Borneo is a culturally diverse nation with many races or ethnics. Hence, it is not surprised that the people have their own unique costumes for both genders that symbolize their ethnicity, in particular the Malays, Chinese, Indians, Kadazan and Dayaks. The Malay women will normally wear their Baju Kurung, Kebaya Labuh, Kebaya Singkat, Kebarung, Baju Perak, Baju Minangkabau, Baju Cik Siti Wan Kembang, for formal events such as Eid Fitri and wedding receptions; or a simple Baju Kedah for their daily wear. These attires are usually made of songket (golden thread), batiks and cotton. On the other hand, the Chinese ladies may wear their red Cheongsam or Qipau which is normally embroidered with elaborate gold and silver designs. Whereas, the Indian womenfolk would dress in their colourful 6 metres Saris made of silk over their coli and the sari are to be wrapped around their waist and draped in different styles. Nevertheless, some Indian ladies sometimes prefer to wear a much simpler salwa khamis. The Kadazan Dusun women will wear Sinuangga and Tapi as their traditional dresses. Likewise, the Dayak and Iban ladies will wear a short woven cloth attached with coins and bells at the bottom. It is called kain tenun betating.

However, Malaysia also has its own national costumes that are worn by both males and females for official functions. They are the Buju Kurung or Kebaya Labuh for the ladies. These are knee length long dresses worn over the sarongs. Whereas the men are to wear Baju Melayu complete with Kain Sampin (sarong made of songket or pelikat) and Songkok (headgear made of black velvet). And, to your question whether I have any plan to exhibit our Malaysian women attires in iran – if have the opportunity, budget and manpower including the models, I would love to share our traditional costumes with the people here.

As a trailing spouse, how many countries have your husband been posted to?

I started my journey as a trailing spouse since 1993 to the present time. We were first posted to Kuwait. After three years there, we were home to the Head Quarters (Wisma Putra). Then, he was posted to Myanmar. We were there for five years. However, during our stay in Myanmar, he was also taken as part of the delegation team to the United Nations General Assembly (UNGA) where we stayed in New York for a little while. We left Yangon in 2004 and once again he was back to Wisma Putra. In 2007, he was posted as Deputy High Commissioner in the Malaysian High Commission in London. I took a no-pay leave and followed him there and likewise continued as his trailing spouse when he was crossed-posted as an Ambassador to Muscat in 2011. And, now we are here since Nowrooz 2017. For more than a year we are blessed and enjoyed the lovely four seasons with its beautiful nature – in particular the colourful tulips in Iran Garden and scented roses in Kashan. We also fall in love with the tranquility of Hafezieh in Shiraz during summer; and play snow balls up in Mount Tochal and Darmavand during winter. Alhamdulilah. (All praises to the Al Mighty Allah).

What are your roles as the wife of the Malaysian Ambassador to the Islamic Republic of Iran?

As an Ambassador’s wife, I am responsible to follow my husband to all formal functions when spouses are invited and planned by the host government as well as events organized by the diplomatic missions. I also take part in all the activities prepared by the Diplomatic Ladies Association (DLA) of the MOFA in Tehran when invited such as Art Classes; Sunday Sharing Session; and visits to historical places and museums across Iran for a better understanding of the Iranian culture and heritage. At the Malaysian Embassy, I play the role of the President of the Malaysian Ladies Association (PERWAKILAN Tehran). We also have the ASEAN Ladies Circle in Tehran where our objectives are to foster friendship; organize some cultural events depicting our countries; and sports’ activities for the members.

You did some charitable works when you were in Oman. Do you have any similar plan for Iran, too?

I head the PERWAKILAN Tehran and also one of the Patrons of the ASEAN Ladies Circle in Tehran – So, one of the activities of our organizations is to lend our helping hands wherever we could to the needy. Indeed, to provide charitable works are part of our goals in every posting. And, similar to Oman, we have played our parts here. For example, last year we took part and provided some Malaysian and ASEAN foods to be sold at the Kahrizak Charity Foundation Bazaar where the proceeds went to the Foundation. Similarly, in early February 2018 we took part in the DLA, Ministry of Foreign Affairs Iran Charity Bazaar at IPIS. Apart from selling our Malaysian savouries such as fried mee hoon (vermicelli), curry puffs, popias and Malaysian desserts and cookies which include kuih kasturi and samperi. We also sold some Malaysian handicrafts and the proceeds of the sale we contributed to the charity. God willing, I wish to do more in the future. Insyallah.

You penned a book in Myanmar. What was the title? What are the topics which you cover in it?

I followed my husband as a diplomat’s trailing spouse to Myanmar from 1999 to 2004. The country which was then ruled by tatmadaw (junta) and under the UN sanctions. So, my families and most of my colleagues at UiTM, were not in favour of me following him and tagging along our school going children there. But, that ‘unfavourable’ thought actually prompted me to write about my life and my family experiencing the happy moments and enjoying our stay there, understanding its unique culture, appreciating the beautiful traditions and adoring the exotic places which I visited and in return I wrote the book based upon my personal observation of the country. The title of my book which was published in Yangon in 2002 was – Myanmar, Seeing is Believing. The book was bi-lingual i.e. in English but also translated into Myanmar language for the local readers.

Among the chapters covered in the book were – the anxiety of my decision whether (to) ‘Go or Not to Go’. To which, I finally decided, “Mus, Just Go!” with a strong believe in our Malay proverb that says: Nasib Sabut Timbul, Nasib Batu Tenggelam (the fate of a coconut husk in a stream will float, but the fate of a stone in a river will sink). I also wrote about the caring and hospitable residents of Yangon or Yangon-thus, whom I met and befriended and their delicious national cuisines which I loved eating them such as mohinga (noodles with fish gravy) and lahpet (tea leaves salad). I shared the spectacular scenes about their men wearing longyi (sarongs) instead of trousers as part of their national attire. They even wore longyi when doing the maintenance work to their high rise buildings and while playing chinlon (cane ball) in a group by hitching and tucking the sarongs upward about their loins. Likewise, I described the varieties of festivals which my family and I were experiencing and enjoying them with the locals such as Thingyan (water festival) and Thadingyut (lantern festival). All in all, the book was about my day to day experiencing the sweet-sour life as a wife, mother, and social worker while accompanying my husband during his tour of diplomatic duty.

Now, we shall talk about foods. Please tell us about Malaysian cuisines. Which one is the most popular? How and what are they made of?

When foods are concerned, Malaysians are ‘go getter’ and ‘good eater’. In short, they are food lovers! Since we are a multi-racial community, our cuisines range from the authentic Malay foods which use lots of coconut milk. We also have the fried Chinese cuisine that uses lots of garlic in its cooking. Finally, the Malaysian foods include the spicy Indians recipes which use lots of spices. For example, the Malay Nasi Lemak (Coconut Rice with sambal ikan bilis, boiled eggs, fried groundnuts and anchovies with slices of fresh cucumber); the Chinese Fried Kway Tiow (Fried Rice Noodles with chopped garlic, shallots, fresh prawns in sesame oil); and the Indians Nasi Kandar served on Banana Leaf (White Rice with toppings of fish or mutton curry, boiled egg, and fried okra). Nowadays, there is a mixture or fusion of Malaysian foods such as Curry Mee and Mee Goreng Mamak (a combination of Indian and Chinese recipe). Among the most popular foods in Malaysia are satay (grilled chicken or meat on a stick or skewer and dipped into groundnut sauce) and Asam Laksa (rice noodles with toppings such as fried tofu, fresh bean sprouts, and slices of boiled eggs in a bowl containing spicy-sour fish broth) as well as Rojak (fried dough fritters with fruits and vegetables dipped in shrimp paste). The street foods like roti canai (fried flat bread which is made of flour, water and oil) and normally eaten with fish curry; and the tasty teh tarik drinks (pulled tea made with sweetened condensed milk) are the most popular foods among the Malaysians and visitors / tourists to Malaysia.

Taking into account the climate differences between Iran and Malaysia, how similar are the two countries cuisines?

Generally, the foods from both countries are different in their looks, textures and tastes. If Malaysian foods are spicy and involve lots of coconuts, spices, hot chilies, sea foods such as fish, prawns, oysters, oil and frying methods, I found the Iranian cuisines is mostly fresh bread or rice with grilled kebabs (both chicken and lamb). Also, Iranians use lots of tomato paste and lamb in their cooking. Saffron and nuts such as pistachios and almonds as well as raisins are common in their gourmet both for savories and desserts. The desserts are extra sweet. However, the soup such as ash-e resteh (Persian noodle soup) are slightly similar to our Malaysian broth (bubur lambuk), where we mixed all the ingredients into the pots. Except that the Iranian uses a special noodle as their main ingredient, whereas we Malaysian use rice. But the other ingredients are considered similar namely; they consist of water, meat, nuts, herbs and vegetables.

You have tasted Iranian foods. Which Iranian meal is your favourite? And, can you cook Iranian foods?

Yes I did, it ranges from chelow kebab (white rice with shaslik) and kebabs either joojeh (chicken) or kubedeh (mixed meat) or mahi (the crispy grilled trout). Also, I have tasted the delicious tahdig (golden crust saffron rice) to the challenging traditional Iranian breakfast dish kale pache which was made with sheep’s entire head including brain, eyes and tongue. I have also savored the various Persian soups such as ash-e-resteh (noodle soup), sup-e-jo (barley soup) and the Iranian stew abg goosht (meat broth) which was called commonly known as dizi (soup thicken with lamb and chick peas. And, I have tried kuku sabzi (the Persian frittata with fresh hebs) which was my favourite. It is more like an omelet. Apart from its delicious taste, this food is also easy to make at home. So far, I have only tried cooking sup-e-jo and kuku sabzi in my kitchen. Perhaps in the future, I would like to cook ash-e-resteh because my husband likes it.

What are your hobbies in Tehran?

Apart from brisk walking or sometimes strolling along the beautiful parks and immense myself with nature across Tehran, namely the Iranian Garden, Chitgar Forest, Niavaran, Jamshedieh, Mellat, and Nahjolbalqeh Parks, I love reading. Most of the times I tagged my reading materials to the parks and sat on the bench while reading the books surrounded by fresh, beautiful trees and colourful scented flowers. I like reading Shahnameh (The Book of Kings) by Ferdowsi. It gives me an insight of mythical and historical past of the Persian Empire. Here, I also jointly Head with another diplomat’s spouse a Book Club organized by DLSG. We start last January 2018. To date, there are 10 like-minded persons who dutifully meet on a monthly basis to share and discuss about the book which we agreed to read before each meeting. The books chosen are both fiction and non-fiction. I always believe reading books is fun; it is not an expensive hobby and most of all it helps us to relax and provides foods to our mind. Reading as a hobby also increases our overall general knowledge and it is worth spending our precious time on it. As stated by George R.R. Martin in A Clash of Kings, “Sleep is Good, but Books are Better”.

You are a member of the Diplomatic Ladies and Spouse Group in Tehran. Tell us about your role. Also, how contributive has the DLSG membership been to the quality of your stay in Iran?

Yes, I am a Member of DLSG in Tehran since I arrived here in March 2017. In fact, I am truly thankful to the group which comprises of lady diplomats and spouses of diplomats (irrespective of gender) which was the second organization that welcome me to Iran after the Malaysian Ladies Association. In DLSG, I was part of its committee Members for One Year – October 2017 to October 2018. I was tasked as the Deputy Treasurer and also Jointly In-Charge of the Book Club. The Committee Members meet every month and we rotate the meeting places among ourselves. This gives me more opportunity to know each other better from different countries and nationalities.

I must confess that by joining DLSG, it has been one of my many happy moments staying in Iran. As a Group, we meet monthly at Coffee Mornings organized by Head of Mission and Spouses of Head of Missions in their embassies or residences. From the Coffee Mornings, I learnt countless new things about other nations’ cultures and traditions. Other activities covered so far by DLSG which I truly enjoyed were the cooking classes where among others, I managed to learn how to cook the Egyptian cuisines, namely Koshari and Umm Ali. The DLA of the Ministry of Foreign Affairs, Iran also invited DLSG members to their activities and visits of spectacular and historical places in Iran. For example, we were introduced to Yalda Night (the longest night of the year or the winter solstice celebration). I appreciated the citing of Hafez poems and understood the importance of red fruits such as pomegranates and watermelons that symbolize the crimson hues of dawn and glow of life. Recently, we were invited to experience rose picking and see the production of rose water in Kashan. It was a mesmerizing experience and indeed the scent of rose spreads over the province. We were invited for lunch at the Manoucheri House, a notable house where its architecture dates back to the Safavid dynasty (1501-1736). We visited the Bagh-e-Fin (Fin Garden) where Amir Kabir who was the Prime Minister of the Qajar dynasty was murdered at Kashan Finn’s Bath in 1852. We also toured Sultan Amir Ahmad Hammam-e-khan (historical bath house) and Borujerdina Residence. I was intrigued by the beautiful and majestic ceilings at the houses and elegant stained glass windows. And, all these activities really help me to understand more about the beautiful Iran and subsequently enhance the quality of my life staying here. To which, I am feeling blessed and thankful to be a trailing spouse and to be posted in this country.

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